Writer's Remorse

Why You Shouldn't Lie When Hiring Writers Online

We all have the internet and we can all call you out

In the vast neighborhood of the internet, Craigslist has got to be that awkward multi-level thrift store in the barren part of town that always smells a little funny. 90% of what's on the shelves will be dusty, perhaps decaying junk hastily cast aside by a neighbor moving in a rush or someone looking to make a quick resale buck. But one time out of ten, you go in to find a warm winter coat that fits perfectly and isn't stained with mysterious dried substances--and for only a dollar fifty at that. Between the batches of obviously stolen GPSes, awkward calls for near-prostitution, and what must be feeble attempts at public humor, there's some real gold on that website. I've used it to find many a gig, from transcription to graphic design. Sometimes employers post on there in real sincerity in hopes of finding someone with talents that meet their needs. And then there are the bumbling ones who couldn't tell a writer from a bucket of wet and hilariously disgruntled kittens.

My First Diary

The diary was green and pink and purple covered in pastel blobs with a golden lock that any one with half a brain, could pick. I remember I had wanted a diary for so long, I am not sure what I could possibly keep from the world at such a young age, but I do know that I wish I had that diary now, even if it meant learning things I didn't want to know, or if it was just a book of secret listings on bizarre celebrity crushes like Mickey Dolenz from "The Monkeys". I can still hear the sound that lock made when it latched open and closed. What an odd thing to remember. I often wonder if he had to do it over again if my dad would have chose the same way to try and win me over, though I know that I would not change a thing. He bought me that diary, like many other small trinkets to try and win my affection. I refused to acknowledge this, and never knew what to say when the other end of the phone echoed with an "I love you."

Read more about My First Diary

Woolf's "A Room of One's Own"

And its relevance to writers.

For my two-semester, freshman orientation class, we had to read Virginia Woolf’s feminist manifesto, A Room of One’s Own. One of the prime tenets of the work—that women were not given autonomy, time and financial support to become successful writers—is both literally and figuratively conveyed by the work’s title, A Room of One’s Own. The title speaks to the literal space writers need to work, but also the personal direction and ability to think for themselves that women were so long denied. Read more about Woolf's "A Room of One's Own"

Writer, Value Thy Self!

If you make just one resolution for 2012, resolve to value yourself and to not allow anyone to undervalue what you have to offer.

Note to Those Looking To Hire Writers: Email With Care

Recently a company named iWriter, which is little more than a content mill catering to internet marketers and others looking for cheap content, sent out a bulk email with the intent of drumming up some new business.

An Open letter To Snow

"i hate you. i hate you. i hate you. i hate you"

Snow -You’re an asshole. You come when you’re not invited, you stay far longer than you’re welcome, and you leave everything a mess when you go. Sometimes you’re light and fluffy, and you blow across my windshield when I’m just trying to get to work. Sometimes you’re wet and depressingly heavy and my back aches just trying to life you off of my driveway. And you’re so clingy, I can’t go anywhere without you hanging on me and melting all over my wood floors. Snow, you’re an asshole. Go home. Read more about An Open letter To Snow

OmmWriter: the Distraction-free Word Processor

App peacefully prevents you from doing anything but writing

Our writing machines are mania-boxes. Sometimes I wish we could go back to the days of the typewriter, or the single-purpose digital word processor. I'd like to thread my sentences on some kind of mechanism that translates keystrokes into letters and nothing more. That way I could unilaterally avoid the incessant temptations of Reddit and Tumblr and Facebook and Gmail and oh God all the internet all of the time.

But even if I owned a typewriter, I'd never use it. I'd have to transcribe all my writing from the inked-up pages to the computer anyway. We've gone digital. There's no going back. Our blank pages are embedded in a portal to more distraction than we can take. We type and publish faster than ever, but we also have more noise to silence than we've ever had before. It's the writer's double-edged sword.

For those who might not have all the diligence, all of the time, to close out the procrastination tabs and stare directly into the white of an empty .doc, there's a new breed of word processor on the scene. It's less of an office tool and more of a relaxation application, meant to clean your mind of all the bugs and tics that keep it from producing crafted English. It's called OmmWriter and it fills your entire screen with a peaceful background for your writing.

Feline-Based Writing Incentives

Written Kitten rewards word counts with cuteness

Remember when we used to get by on positive reinforcements? Long before the threat of bad grades loomed over our written work, way back when we had just learned to put pencil to paper pointy-side-down, we expressed ourselves to garner praise or stickers or both from our teachers and parents. We put words in front of other words because hey, we finally could, and everyone witness to our newfound potential for syntactical creation thought it was pretty darn neat. We wrote for happy feelings, seeking reward instead of fearing punishment.

Then adulthood happened, and those of us who kept building word chains did so thanks to negative reinforcement. But wouldn't it be nice if we could go back to that sticker-seeking mentality? Well, thanks to the internet, we can. With kittens.

NaMoWriMo

I'm bummed that I didn't do it.

I was all gung ho this year to really finish my NaNoWriMo novel. Or at least get a solid start on the 50,000 word goal. I had divided the 50,000 words by the 31 days in November, which came out to a completely manageable goal of 1,500 words each day. Most promising of all, I was excited to be writing fiction again, and to have a community of writers with whom I could mark my progress. Read more about NaMoWriMo

Blogging: Be Yourself

Your personal blog should reflect you.

Writing is a difficult thing; some organizations prefer writers who can grind out dry, textbook writing that looks exactly the same each time. Other organizations prefer their writers to be a little more creative. But when you write your own blog, you can shape your writing however you want.